The Odd Trio
by celrock
Summary: We all know what happened in the season 3 Rugrats episode, The Odd Couple, when Tommy stayed at Chuckie's house for the first time over a long weekend, but what if instead, he had stayed at Phil and Lil's? What would be different? Read to find out!


Author's Note: I know I don't do birthday stories anymore, but since one of my regular Fan Fiction readers, does have a birthday today, on the day I'm posting this, or at least, initially writing this, in the event it doesn't get posted until shortly after midnight my time, I'd like to wish Brainyxbat, a very Happy Birthday! Hope it's been an awesome day, and whether you spent your day eating dogfood, dressing up like a baby, or doing what normal people do on birthdays, I hope you had a good one. With that out of the way, let's move on to the story! I've been thinking about how I wanted this one to go all day, so hope you enjoy it!

The Odd Trio

Summary: We all know what happened in the season 3 Rugrats episode, The Odd Couple, when Tommy stayed at Chuckie's house for the first time over a long weekend, but what if instead, he had stayed at Phil and Lil's? What would be different? Read to find out!

Disclaimer: I do not own the original Rugrats characters, they're the property of their original creators.

The story begins, with Chuckie, sitting on the floor of Phil and Lil's room, as the twins, with a large picture book out in front of him, try to tell him a story.

"Once upon a time, there was a beautiful princess." Lil narrates, before Phil cuts her off, pointing at the pictures in the book.

"It's not a beautiful princess Lillian, it's a pony." Phil argues.

"No Phillip, it's a princess." Lil argues, snatching the book away from Phil.

"No Lillian, it's a princess." Phil argues.

"Princess!" Lil screams, pulling on one side of the book.

"Pony!" Phil argues, pulling on the other half of the book.

The twins continue to argue, until Chuckie stands up, stomping his foot on the ground. His stomping startles the twins, causing them to rip the book in half, sending torn pages everywhere.

"Hey you two, stop! Now look what you did." Chuckie says, pointing to the torn pages and two halves of the book, scattered about the room.

Phil and Lil gasp at the sight of the mess, before turning their attention back to the disappointed redhead.

"Sorry." Phil and Lil argued, just as the scene cut to the office slash exercise area down the hall.

Betty is working out on a treadmill, just as she hears the phone ring. She powers down the machine and goes to answer the phone on Howard's desk.

"Hello?" Betty says into the phone.

"Hi Betty." Didi says on the other end.

"Oh hey Deed, what's up?" Betty asks.

"Well, Stu and I are going off to this cheese tasting festival, and we're wondering if you and Howard could look after Tommy over the long weekend." Didi says.

"It's no problem Deed, the pups could use somebody to play with this long weekend." Betty says, hanging up the phone, and continuing her workout, moving on to weight training.

A short while later, Didi drops Tommy with his overnight stuff off in Phil and Lil's room.

"Mommy will be back after the long weekend." Didi says, kissing the top of Tommy's head, before heading out the door, and letting Betty know where she'll be over the next few days.

An excited Tommy turns his attention to Phil and Lil.

"Hey you guys guess what? I'm gonna be staying for a long weekend!" Tommy cries.

"Yay!" Phil and Lil exclaim in unison, jumping up and down.

"We're gonna have so much fun!" Lil comments.

"Oh boy." Chuckie says with a reluctant sigh.

"Something wrong Chuckie?" Tommy asks in concern, glancing at his best friend, who stands in the corner with his arms folded.

Chuckie slowly approaches Tommy.

"Come on Tommy, you don't wanna spend the weekend with Phil and Lil, do you?" Chuckie asks.

"Come on Chuckie, Phil and Lil are our friends! We're gonna have fun, you'll see." Tommy says.

"Yeah, but, they argue a lot, and, they can be kind of disgusting at times, you know, with how much they play in the mud and eat worms and bugs and stuff." Chuckie comments.

"Yeah, but, it don't mean it won't be fun. We like Reptar, and have lots of fun too!" Tommy says, looking at his weekend with an optimistic attitude.

"Don't worry, we'll try not to argue too much in front of Tommy." Phil comments.

"And we'll cut back on playing in the mud, cuz we know Tommy would rather play in the sandbox." Lil adds.

"Well, okay, if you say so…" Chuckie says, a bit unsure as to how this weekend will go.

Sometime later, after Chuckie has headed home with his daddy, Tommy, Phil and Lil are playing with toys in their room.

"Wow Phil and Lil, your daddy's the bestest cook ever! I never have spaghetti and meatballs covered in cheese at home." Tommy comments.

"Yeah, they're not wormies, but they're almost as good." Phil adds.

"You know what guys, Chuckie don't know what he's talking about. We're gonna have lots of fun this weekend." Tommy said, stacking another block on his tower.

"I could go for some dessert, how about you Phil." Lil asks.

"After you Lil." Phil says, reaching into his diaper and handing his sister a worm.

"Wow! What are we having for dessert? Reptar bars? A lollipop? Ice cream?" Tommy asks eagerly.

"Even betterer!" Phil exclaims, pulling out a rolly polly from his diaper, and handing it to Tommy.

"Uh, g Phil, thanks." Tommy says, staring down at the bug in his hand in disgust.

He slowly brings his hand up to his mouth, but can't bring himself to eat the rolly polly, as he sets it free on to the carpet. Before Phil can snatch it up though, the bug crawls beneath the dresser, where the babies can't reach it. Meanwhile, Phil shrugs his shoulders.

"At my house, we have Reptar bars for dessert, but if you guys wanna eat bugs, that's good enough for me, but I think I'll pass." Tommy comments.

Later, after the three toddlers are ready for bed and Howard is getting their bottles of milk ready, since Phil and Lil sleep in separate cribs across the room from one another, they start arguing about who Tommy will sleep with that night.

"I want Tommy to sleep with me!" Phil argues, as Tommy runs over to Phil's crib.

"No Tommy, tonight, how about you sleep with me!" Lil says, as Tommy runs over to Lil's crib.

"I believe he's sleeping with me, Lillian." Phil argues.

"No, he's sleeping with me, Phillip." Lil argues.

The arguing continues as Tommy continues to run in between the beds, nearly out of breath, finally collapsing on the floor, a few inches from Phil's bed.

"You guys, I've gots an idea. How about I sleep with Phil tonight, and I'll sleep with Lil tomorrow." Tommy suggests.

"Okay." Phil and Lil reply in unison.

A little while later, everybody is in bed, finishing their bottles of milk and drifting off to sleep, to Howard's nighty night song, well, all except Tommy, who's covering his ears, unable to stand Howard's horrible off key singing. Finally, he turns out the lights and leaves the room, at which time, Tommy breathes a sigh of relief, uncovering his ears as he finally, drifts off to sleep. During the night though, Phil drools and sneezes in his sleep, leaving a trail of saliva and boogers all over Tommy's pillow. Tommy squirms in his bed uncomfortably, trying to find a spot that's not wet with Phil's drool and boogers.

The next morning, while breakfast goes smoothly, as the kids eat Reptar cereal, it's raining, so they can't go play outside.

"So, what are we gonna do today you guys?" Tommy asks, taking the last bite of his Reptar cereal.

"We're gonna stay in our jammies all day!" Lil replies.

"And watch Reptar videos, and the new episode of Aventure Squad!" Phil adds.

"Wow neat! Sounds like fun!" Tommy says, as they run into the living room and start watching a Reptar video.

While he has fun at first, after a few hours go by of watching Reptar videos, followed by several episodes of Adventure Squad, Tommy starts to get bored of sitting around, watching TV, wanting to do something different.

"Uh, you guys, think we can go play now?" Tommy asks in the middle of an Adventure Squad episode.

"Oh, but Tommy, this aventure is getting to a really good part!" Phil says.

"Yeah, but I think our aventures are much funnerer. We never spend this long watching TV at my house. Look! The rain stopped." Tommy comments, pointing out the window where they see the rain has stopped, and the ground is covered in mud.

Phil and Lil point over to the window, excited to see the yard covered in mud.

"We can play mud people, come on Phillip." Lil says, grabbing her brother's hand, as they head for the doggy door out into the backyard.

Tommy, uninterested in playing in the mud, doesn't move.

"Come on Tommy, it's fun!" Phil says, heading out into the backyard.

Not wishing to look like a rude guest, Tommy follows Phil out into the backyard, stopping at the edge of the patio, sticking his feet into the mud and wiggling his toes.

"You're right Phil, this mud does feel nice." Tommy comments, wiggling his toes and letting out a small giggle.

"Aw come on Tommy, that's not how you play in the mud." Phil says.

"It's not?" Tommy asks.

"No, it's not." Lil says, jumping head first into the muddy ground.

"You've gots to really get down and dirty into the mud, like this." Phil says, diving into the mud puddle along side his sister, grabbing up a huge clump of mud, and throwing it at Tommy.

For a few minutes, the three of them have a mud fight, though Tommy doesn't look like he's enjoying himself after a while.

"Uh, you guys, won't your mommy and daddy get mad if we come inside, covered in mud? At my house, I'm not spose to play like that in the mud." Tommy says.

"Don't worry Tommy, it's fun!" Phil says, placing a glob of mud on his head.

"At our house, daddy just carries us inside and gets us all clean and don't yell." Lil adds.

Tommy isn't convinced, as he finds the garden hose, figures out how to turn it on, and starts washing himself off, spraying water everywhere. Phil and Lil simply stare at one another, unimpressed.

Later, no longer covered in mud, the three of them are in Phil and Lil's playpen in the living room, trying to decide what to do.

"So, what do you wanna play now guys?" Tommy asks.

"Let's play with our blocks!" Lil suggests, running for the basket of blocks.

"How about we play roll the ball." Phil suggests, grabbing a ball out of the corner.

"Roll the ball sounds like fun!" Tommy agrees.

So the three of them start playing roll the ball, until Tommy finds he's being excluded, as Phil and Lil start rolling the ball to each other, forgetting Tommy's in the room.

"Uh, you guys, did you forget something?" Tommy asks.

"What do you mean?" Lil asks, glancing up from her roll the ball game to stare at Tommy.

"At my house, we always play with each other, and you guys forgotted to roll the ball to me." Tommy says.

"Oops? Sorry." Phil mutters.

"Yeah, sorry." Lil ads, as they start their game over again, making sure to include Tommy this time.

Finally, nighttime rolls around, and this time, Tommy is sleeping in Lil's crib next to her, since he slept with Phil the previous night. However, earlier that evening, the gang had franks and beans for dinner, so while Tommy didn't have to deal with avoiding a pillow covered in drool and boogers, he was constantly awakened by Phil and Lil farting throughout the night, constantly covering his nose to be rid of the smell, and covering his ears.

" _I don't know what's worser? Phil and Lil's loud poops, or that nighty nighty song their daddy sang before shutting out the lights? I'd cry for their mommy and daddy, but I don't wanna hear that song one more time._ " Tommy thought to himself, as he turned away from Lil, only to get a wiff of Phil's farts in the air.

Tommy let out a huge sigh, as he continued to toss and turn uncomfortably the rest of the night.

The following day, Chuckie came to play, as he was seen wearing a doctor's outfit, and Lil is covered in several Reptar bandages.

"You guys having fun with Tommy?" Chuckie asks, placing another bandage on Lil's forehead.

"Yeah! We've been eating Reptar cereal, and watching Aventure Squad, and playing in the mud!" Phil comments.

"Yeah! It's lots of fun, right Tommy?" Lil asks.

Tommy quietly nods, as he watches Chuckie take bandages from the box in Phil's hand, and cover Lil.

"Now Lil, you've gots the biggerest booboo in the world. You'd better take it easy. Oh, but firstest, Nurse Phil, can you get me some more stickies?" Chuckie asks.

"No problem. Come on Lil." Phil says, grabbing his sister's hand, as the two of them run out of the room towards the medicine cabinet in the bathroom.

Tommy uses this opportunity to approach his best friend, and tell him how things are really going.

"You were right Chuckie, I'm not having any fun at all. Either Phil and Lil are arguing over me over what to play, or who's gonna sleep with who, and then, they make me play in the mud, even after I'd tolded them I didn't want to, and if I've gots to eat another rolly polly or wormie for dessert again, I'm gonna throw up!" Tommy complains.

"I can't believe I'm saying this Tommy, but, I told you this, staying with Phil and Lil thing, wasn't such a good idea." Chuckie says, just as Phil and Lil return to the room, with another new box of bandages.

Later, after Chuckie has gone home, Phil and Lil have a box of crayons out near one of the walls in the hall, but no coloring book.

"What are we playing now guys?" Tommy asks.

"We're gonna draw Tommy." Lil says, pulling a red crayon out of the box and handing it to him.

"But don't we need a coloring book?" Tommy asks, glancing around the hallway.

"Don't need one." Phil replies, taking a blue crayon out of the box, and walking up to the wall.

"Yeah Tommy, we color on the walls." Lil says, walking up next to her brother carrying a purple crayon.

Just then, Tommy walks up behind Phil and Lil, reaches around, and snatches the crayons out of their hands.

"Hey!" Phil and Lil cry in unison.

"What was that for?" Lil asks, rolling her eyes at Tommy.

"You guys, we can't draw on the walls, I know if I do that at my house, I'll get in trouble!" Tommy says.

Phil and Lil just glare at him angrily, unsure of how to respond.

The next day, Chuckie comes to play. This time, they're playing Find Reptar, where one person hides Phil and Lil's Reptar doll somewhere around the house, and they pick another baby to go find him.

"So you guys, how's it going?" Chuckie asks the twins.

"It's lots of fun! We watch Aventure Squad, and play with blocks, and have fun playing together, right Phil?" Lil asks, turning to her brother.

"Uh, yeah." Phil replies, a bit unsure.

Tommy has a similar look on his face to that of Phil's, as they begin playing their game. A little while later, Chuckie has returned with the Reptar toy, and hands it over to Tommy.

"Okay Tommy, I founded Reptar, so you get to hide him nextest." Chuckie says, handing Tommy the Reptar toy.

"Alright, I'll be back soon." Tommy says, heading out of the room with the Reptar doll to hide it.

Phil and Lil take this opportunity to approach Chuckie and complain to him about how things are going, without Tommy present.

"Uh, Chuckie, Tommy's no fun no more." Phil says.

"What do you mean?" Chuckie asks.

"He's always telling us how he does things in his house, and don't wanna eat bugs or play in the mud." Lil explains.

"And yesterday, he stopped us from drawing on the walls, telling us how he's not allowed to do that in his house, cuz he'll get in trouble." Phil says.

"I can't believe I'm saying this you guys, but I knew this having Tommy stay with you guys thing wasn't such a good idea." Chuckie comments, as Tommy comes back into the room, empty handed, ready to pick somebody to go find where he hid Reptar.

Later that day, after Chuckie has gone home, Tommy, Phil and Lil are out in the backyard, standing in front of a mud puddle.

"Come on Tommy, wanna try playing in the mud again?" Phil asks.

"Or we could have these delicious wormies for a snack!" Lil offers, dangling a worm in front of Tommy's face.

"I thought we were going to play in the mud, Lillian." Phil says.

"No Phillip, it's snack time, so let's eat our wormies!" Lil argues.

"Mud!" Phil argues, throwing a glob at Lil, but missing her, causing the mud to land on Tommy's head and front of his shirt instead.

"Wormies!" Lil argues, who means to throw the worm at Phil, but drops it due to it being too slippery, right into Tommy's diaper, where it starts crawling around.

As Tommy is trying to uncover himself of mud, he starts laughing, as the worm crawling around inside his diaper, tickles him.

"Sto'ho'ho'hop!" Tommy cries, finally grabbing the worm out of his diaper, and tossing it over the fence.

"Hey! That was our wormie!" Phil screams.

Tommy's face turns red with anger, as he glares at Phil.

"Well, now it's gone! And you know what you guys? I'm glad it's gone! I don't like to eat wormies, I'm sick of playing in the mud, and I just, wanna go home!" Tommy screams, throwing the blogs of mud on his shirt across the yard, covering Phil and Lil's Reptar doll that's lying in the grass.

"Our Reptar doll, you ruined him!" Lil cries, bursting into tears, as she runs over to grab up the toy, which is all ruined, as the green material starts coming off the front of the doll, and stuffing inside comes out.

Soon after, Phil and Tommy start crying along side Lil, as the three of them, have a good cry.

"What's the matter kids?" Howard says, as he and Betty run outside, to see what's the matter.

They pick up the kids and carry them inside, where they're given a bath, some dinner of macaroni and cheese, and put to bed, this time, with Tommy, sleeping on a pillow and blanket on the floor in between the two cribs.

"Phil, Lil, I'm sorry I got so mad at you guys, and I'm sorry I threw your wormie away and ruined your favoritest Reptar toy. It's just, I miss my mommy and daddy, and, I miss my house and doing things my way." Tommy apologized.

"It's okay Tommy." Phil says.

"Yeah, we're sorry we weren't betterer at making you more comfortablerer." Lil adds.

"And arguing." Phil says.

"And not always including you." Lil says.

"It's okay you guys." Tommy says.

Just then, Phil and Lil sit up in their cribs, as they proceed to climb over the bars, down to the floor, and curl up on either side of Tommy.

"Here Tommy, we'll both come sleep with you." Phil says, curling up on Tommy's right side.

"Yeah, well, night night." Lil says, curling up on Tommy's left side on the floor.

"No arguing?" Tommy asks in surprise.

"Nah." Phil and Lil reply in unison, as everybody yawns, closes their eyes, and drifts off to sleep.

The next day, Stu and Didi arrive to pick up Tommy, and head on home, where Tommy heads out into the backyard, and rolls around in the grass with Spike. In the mids of rolling around in the grass, Tommy lands in a mud puddle, where he gets covered in mud and dog slobber, as Spike licks him. Tommy giggles, getting covered in the mud.

"You know what Spike, it's great to be home. And as for playing in the mud, it's fun, but only, every once in a while." Tommy says, giving his dog a hug, leaving muddy hand prints all over his fur.

The End

Author's Note: Okay, so maybe it sort of went in the opposite direction of the original episode, given Phil and Lil are a lot more messy and disgusting, while Tommy's just, messy and unorganized, and Chuckie's a neat freak, but I hope you liked my alternate take on this particular episode. I thought about making Tommy having to wear one of those puffy diapers after running out of the ones that his parents sent with him, but since I had this take place pre Dil and Kimi in an alternate universe, I decided, he had suffered enough. Anyway, I hope you guys enjoyed this story, and, I hope to be back soon, with more material!


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